I don't know why but I have been putting off writing this down for quite some time. Perhaps it's because things didn't go exactly how I would have wanted but that's ok. Warning, there might be a few things in here that might be a little TMI for some people, so you might want to stop reading now, haha!

For the last couple weeks of my pregnancy, I kept thinking every night when I went to bed that it would be the night this baby would come. I'm pretty sure I was driving my husband crazy! I did have some random contractions here and there near the end. 

 The night before I had our baby, I went to go get my hair cut because I was panicked that the baby would be here so soon & that it would be a long time before I got a hair cut again (for the record I was right, and haven't had a hair cut since!). After I got my hair done, I decided to go run a few errands and shop around a little bit. Once again, I had this funny feeling that the baby was going to come that night so I thought I better enjoy the tiny bit of somewhat freedom I had left, haha! I was also paranoid that I was leaking amniotic fluid. I decided if I didn't go into labor that night, I would go get it checked out in the morning. I went to Home Depot looking for a snake plant because like any sane pregnant lady, I was dead set on finding before this baby came. I just had to have this snake plant for this baby. Totally rational, right? 😉

I went into HomeSense to look around, and came across the most beautiful wood shelf in the shape of the letter "A". Funny enough the only name we had picked out was for a boy, and it was Alder. I took this as a sign from the big guy that we were going to have a little boy named Alder, and that this baby was coming tonight. When I got home, my husband had been in full nesting mode frantically cleaning all the dishes, and I was totally relaxed. Which was so opposite, haha! I went to bed pretty early, knowing I was probably going to get woken up rather unpleasantly.

I woke up around five and got up to use the bathroom, as one does quite frequently when pregnant. I woke up again 40 minutes later with contractions. They were about 7 minutes apart. We started gathering all our stuff, made a phone call to my best friend, and woke up Emery. We drove over and dropped off Em at my best friends house (thank you Ali and Vince, total life savers), and made our way to the hospital. At this point the contractions were about 3 minutes apart but still manageable. Funny fact, on the way to the hospital I did my make-up in between contractions. I mostly just did it to distract myself from the contractions. I also had a Safeway donut for breakfast, that I grabbed from our counter on the way out the door. Healthy, I know but obviously I had to milk my pregnancy for all it was worth till the very end, right?

We parked the car in the parking lot and waddled on in. When we got inside we had to register downstairs before going up to the L&D. The lady at the front wasn't super pleasant, and we had to wait for a Porter to come take us upstairs. This drives me crazy, haha! I remember with Em, the guy took foreeeever to take us upstairs. Once we got up there, I got checked out right away in a little triage room. They checked to see if I was leaking amniotic fluid but they weren't entirely sure. At this point it was 7:30 in the morning. She did a check to see how things were progressing, and I was 6 cm and thin (90% effaced).  We stayed in the triage room for a little bit and then worked our way down to the Labor room. It look us awhile to get there, as every time I had a contraction we stopped. At this point I was digging my nails into Aaron's hands every contraction. Thanks babe!

We finally got settled into our room. There was a speaker dock for an iPod in our room, and I made Aaron plug in mine and put Hanson on. That's right, I was in labour listening to Hanson (they are my all-time favourite band). Things were progressing pretty fast for me (Emery's labour was the same) so they said if I had wanted an epidural that I had to get one now. Around 9:20, I got my epidural. If you know me, I'm not very good with needles, hospitals or anything medical. When I got my epidural with Emery, it was no problem. This time for some reason, I had a hard time. First the nurse couldn't get my I.V in so they sent in another nurse to do it. It took a little while for the anesthesiologist to place the epidural because I had a hard time staying still. I felt quite nauseous and faint during the procedure. Afterwards, I felt much better. I am always so so impressed by the women who don't have an epidural, I don't think it's in me, haha! So we just chilled out for awhile, I sent Aaron to get some breakfast.

Around 11 a.m, I had a small leak of amniotic fluid. Ten minutes later my water broke. I actually felt it, it was kind of like a pop. Such a weird sensation. Last time with Emery I didn't notice that it had happened. When it burst they discovered meconium in the waters (meaning the baby had pooped in utero, this usually happens because the baby is in distress). When this happened, I was sort of freaking out but trying to remain calm. During the whole labour I kept repeating this bible verse in my head , "I sought the Lord, and he answered me. He delivered me from all my fears. Those who look to Him are radiant, their faces are never covered in shame." Psalm 34:4-6. Praying that verse over and over really helped me so much during this labour. So after they discovered the meconium, the baby's heart rate was normal so they were just going to keep an eye on it. My blood pressure started getting quite low so they gave me some medicine for that. The doctors came in around 11:45 to check how things were progressing. They discovered that the baby was sunny side up. They sent in a resident doctor who attempted to turn the baby but had no success. We hung out for awhile waiting to push. I found this so stressful, I was never quite sure if I felt ready to push or the pressure to. The nurse got me to start pushing around 12:20 p.m, we pushed for awhile. The doctor on call came in and tried to flip the baby again. Every time he would try and flip the baby, it would just flip back. The Baby's heart rate was dropping so the Dr decide we had to go in for an emergency c-section.

It was very scary, it all happened so fast. The doctor really rushed all the nurses, and everyone who was working. It felt like I was on an episode of Greys Anatomy as they were pushing me down to the O.R. I closed my eyes the whole time just praying that verse in my head over and over again. I got separated from Aaron till they prepped me and the room for surgery. While they were getting me ready, I asked a couple of nurses if I could hold my baby right after. I could tell the one nurse was going to say it was ok but the other nurse piped up and said no. Finally Aaron got to come in and it was pretty emotional finally getting to seem him again. We were both so scared. They started the procedure. I couldn't feel anything but just a tugging/pulling sensation. It was pretty uncomfortable and made me pretty nauseous. It happened really fast, and we heard the baby crying. I yelled out "What is it?", and the doctor replied "it's a boy!" I mean the hubby and I were already crying but I'm pretty sure we were both sobbing at this point. Also it turns out the cord had been wrapped around his neck three times which is why he kept flipping back every time they tried to turn him.

Birth Story

marble baby swaddle

Birth story

Birth story

The nurses took him over to the little bed to wipe him down, check him out, etc. It was really hard for me to him. Aaron went with them to meet him. He was born at 1:46 p.m, 7 pounds 14 ounces, and 20 inches long! Born exactly one week early, just like his big sister. Aaron then brought him over to me. He was beautiful with a head full of dark hair! At this point, Aaron got to hold him skin-to-skin. I am so grateful that Aaron was able to do this, but I also to this day still can't understand why I couldn't have held him. The very nice anesthesiologist took pictures with my phone which was so awesome. While Aaron was holding him they they discovered he was having trouble breathing. So they rushed him up to the NICU, Aaron went with him. The anesthesiologist thought that the phone he was using was Aaron's so he ran after him to give him my phone. I was to doped up and exhausted to say anything. It felt like it took a very long time for them to stitch me up. When they were finally done, the doctor told me that if I ever wanted to have more kids that I would have to have a c-section. He said they had discovered something or something along those lines that meant I would't be able to have a v-bac again. I was so drugged that I knew I wasn't going to remember exactly what he said. I finally got wheeled to my recovery room with the sweetest nurse. I was in there for a couple of hours and had no contact with Aaron & our baby since he had both of our phones. This was so incredibly hard being separated from them, and still not holding my baby. The nurse kept calling for me to check in on them. Finally Aaron & our baby made their way back to where we were. Turns out that he didn't need any intervention that skin-to-skin with Aaron was the right medicine. I'm so glad that Aaron was able to do that. Little man was so hungry, and thankfully latched right away. That was something I was so anxious about as Emery had lots of trouble. We finally got to head down to our room in the postpartum ward.

Birth story

Birth story

marble baby swaddle

baby going home outfit

With both of my babies, I never really had a birth plan. I just planned to go with the flow, and knew that anything could happen. In the back of my mind, I did not want a c-section. As I previously mentioned, I don't do well with anything medical so a c-section seemed like something I wouldn't be able to handle well. I'm still coming to terms with how things played out, and it was very hard the first couple of weeks. I kept replaying everything in my head and my heart just ached not being able to hold Alder right away. I'm just so grateful to God for protecting both of us, and getting that sweet boy out safely.

Alder Harland, you are our sweet little baby and we can't imagine our family without you. I could spend my whole life kissing those cheeks of yours. We love you so.